Here it is, my quarterly update! (I wish that was even a slight joke…)
I have been home for just over a week now and have had time to reflect on being away as well as being home. The first night was really weird, I walked around the house feeling like a visitor, I can’t really explain why it felt so strange. It was great to spend time with my family and see my friends, of course. Not going to lie, it was even better getting back on the horses…..
So, how has it been? I’d say, pretty fab. I think back to things that feel like they happened yesterday and realising they happened months ago. I think about saying see ya to my friends like it was months and seconds ago at the same time. The time has just disappeared. Anyway, enough of the obvious.
I think, personally, the biggest change I’ve felt is becoming a lot more logical. I’m sure the sertraline had an effect, my mind wasn’t just a mash of, ‘shit, time to meltdown’ and fog. But towards coming home and definitely since being home, things because a lot more of a path than a puddle, I guess. There is no familiar feeling of drowning and things appear a lot more easily solved with a logical mindset. I don’t recommend anyone stopping their medication cold turkey, I just happened to forgot them for a few days and decided to try and see what life was like again off them. So far so good, I know I might need to top up but I’m happy with how things are going.
Another big thought I had which really changed my perspective, is working backwards. Through my research of English lesson planning, I realised the most important thing was the start at the end. To put this into an example, I want my lifestyle to continue this way for a little longer, so my end goal is to keep travelling. That takes money (obviously), do I want to work for someone or for myself? Okay, what can I do freelance? How much do I want to work? And continue to unpick the big idea of where you want your life to go. This isn’t for you if your end goal is to make a shit load of money, here’s an easy path: go work in finance, kill yourself on 100+ hrs a week and enjoy whatever is left of your free time. Also, you won’t get there through Forex or any other MLM schemes. You really have to take a look at what direction you want to head and understand this isn’t about making money but making time. This is something I’m really hoping to continue while travelling, I’ve made a good start and I’m happy where I’m heading!
I’ve also got a renewed love for learning languages. It was SO. freakin. Cool!! To be in Norway, speaking their language and understanding when people spoke to me. At my hotel, I asked the receptionist, “hvor er nærmeste matbutikk?” and she replied in Norwegian. Just to make sure I understood, I rehashed her directioned in English. She looked at my startled and asked me to repeat, then said, “oh, English! Well…” It was definitely a moment of, “woah, ok. She really did understand me!”. I find it hard to have the confidence to speak Norwegian, this is something called Second Language Anxiety that (according to Google) most people experience when not talking in their native tongue. Men, n(a) jeg vil snakker norsk med hvem som helst. Dessverre jeg har ikke norsk venner i hjemme.
I think I will just keep to speaking it on my insta story…badly…
Nah, but I love seeing a word and recognising what it means. It’s like cracking a code!
What’s next then? I leave for Portugal in a couple of weeks, a horizon I’ve never ventured before so that’s exciting. And then in a month, I will leave to work in Ireland for the Summer. As much as it’s nice to be home…I am so ready to pack my bag again!